Saying Good-Bye

Yesterday I missed my weekend wrap-up (which will return later this week), as we dedicated our Monday to saying good-bye.

Last week I mentioned the shocking news we received that sent both Danny and I reeling. A special family friend, a warrior for the CF Foundation, and a truly beautiful soul was tragically taken from this world. Carolyn Mattingly supported her husband in his career mission to cure Cystic Fibrosis for over 30 years. That is how we had come to know this couple. Rich is the organization’s executive vice president and chief operating officer, leading the foundation through some incredible milestones. Carolyn has truly been his partner, in every sense of the word - not just his wife but someone who became a face for the CF community and dedicated her time and efforts to the cause at every opportunity. For us though, what always made them so special was that they cared for Danny and I. They truly loved us as people - wanting to celebrate all of our milestones, send support when things were rocky and they always, ALWAYS greeted us with the most welcoming and open arms….like they had come to that CF event just to see us. You must have those people in your life too? That make you feel like the world has stopped just to hear what you have to say? They not only dedicated themselves to the cause….but to the people.

Yesterday was Carolyn’s funeral and Danny and I attended with his parents. I have been blessed in my life to only attend a few funerals, but each them have been meaningful and sad in their own way. This funeral was truly the most unique - a complete celebration of life while truly feeling the immense hole that will be left in this world without her. We learned that Carolyn’s love for those with CF and us was shared with countless others. She truly gave every part of her person to others - her family, her causes, her community…Danny and I left knowing that we had to do better in our life. We had to give more, we had to love more, and we had to strive to live for love of life and others. Leaving a funeral so motivated, so determined, so grateful - even in her passing, she is gifting those around her with an important message.

Death always leaves the feeling of why. There are those who may pass of old age and have truly lived - but even then it still leave us with a feeling of wonder - it is human nature. It is always heartbreaking that life ends with illness and someone's body simply wearing out. There are those random accidents that just happen and it really is no one’s fault, but it just seems so unfair. However yesterday’s was due to tragedy - and it truly feels like stolen time. This wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, leader, - was literally taken and there are no words to address that fact, but the pain was there and it was thick.

Even through the pain, the ceremony was so increbilbly beautiful - I was in awe of all that was said, shared, given….and in disbelief of how those who knew her best were able in their darkest sadness to open up and share her with all of us. The realization of why we were there never was to far from my mind tarnishing the moments of laughter through tears at an special memory or story….making it an odd mix of emotions. But the true fact from yesterday is we left grateful for having known her and wanting so badly to find our quiet ways to give and love just like her, meaning her legacy will only continue. And we hugged her family and shared with them how much we loved her and them….even though we know that sentiment will hardly ease a fraction of their pain. It was an honor to be there to celebrate her and as her daughter so beautifully said - she is now taking care of all those CF children who were already called home….even in her leaving she is comforting those less fortunate and for that we are so eternally grateful.

During this incredible time of sadness and pain the Mattingly family has chosen to give back and request funds for the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation in Carolyn’s honor. The Bessette’s would like to thank them and those who give for turning this time of pain into hope, for those suffering from this disease.