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Next up on meet the Bessette's, Danny! This one will be a little different as I am introducing Danny, so this is all from my point of view. How I envision his passions, favorite pastimes, dislikes and his struggles - so maybe in the future we will add in his critique, but for now you get me! Just like myself, Danny is also suffering from the age thing……late, late, late 20s….29! The first birthday we ever celebrated together was his 21st -so we are feeling a little old these days (this is where our parents roll their eyes)! A rare find in this area, Danny has also lived most of his life in Northern Virginia. He is the younger of two boys and will always be the baby of his family (even if he denies it!). Danny’s passions are his family, friends, puppy and sports. I have chosen these very carefully for him, utilizing the same definition I used for myself (Meet Jackie) - these are the priorities which determine his day to day life. Danny is very much the ying to my yang: my passions are pretty obvious and lived out loud versus, Danny’s that are important, but no need to broadcast or constantly reference them, just direct your actions to match your emotions.
Let me explain…..Danny is not the type of person who is on the phone for hours, catching every detail, commenting on every fear or whim or frustration with family and friends- but the importance of being “in someone’s corner” is paramount to him. If you need something, just ask! If you want to drown your sorrows or celebrate your success just say the word and he is there! We just finished dedicating a whole weekends travel for just a few hours of celebrating a friend’s birthday. I even suggested we go another weekend when we can really visit with him- but Dan would not hear it….he said we got an invite, we are there. He has made an effort to get to know my siblings on his own - learn their interests and determine how he can support their dreams. Danny likes things on his own time and privately (he HATES Facebook).
Our puppy is his little buddy. He is so in tune to what Quinlan might need or want - I just know our future kids will have one awesome dad. I may worry out loud about the dog or read the books or ask the vet nothing short of 100 questions - Danny, he just loves on the little guy, reads his mood and does his best to anticipate a need. Danny constantly reminds me that giving him our best IS THE BEST….and that he is a pretty happy pup. They nap together, are often moody together and both are so stubborn - and often to one another. They may have their moments, but when Q is ready to go on an adventure or for a game of fetch or wrestling, Dan is always the first choice. I hear him say, love you bud and it MELTS.MY.HEART.
Then there is sports. Danny loves sports. Well, even that does not describe it…..Danny sleeps, eats, breathes sports. He enjoys other things - a great movie, reading, traveling, music, cooking (THANK YOU GOD!!!), the beach, fishing, boats etc. - but he is fanatical about sports. Now to say I always appreciate this quality is not quite true - I have lost my patience many times while our living room has 4 TVs for football sunday, or a drive in traffic is made only more irritating by the SLOW PLODDING reporting of a baseball game…..but this past year, I really started to appreciate it - and maybe (in a teeny, tiny way) get it. Danny returned to hockey coaching this year but instead of a club group to our alma mater high school, Bishop O’Connell. Watching him coach, listening about a practice and each game, or one on one time with a player - has easily turned into one of my favorite wifely moments. He really wants the kids to fall in love with the sport like he did! He constantly thinks of ways to help them “get” the value of a team or putting on a game face. When a bad call comes their way - Danny shares their pain and frustration. Danny loves sports because it reminds him of all the really good things in life. Sports is an experience globally available to all who want to join. It has a history, it honors talent and passion, and presents the opportunity to pay homage to a town, a nation, a culture through a shared pastime! Danny learned how to work hard, be accountable and fight for your win on the ice/field. Sports represents so much of what the world has to offer…… and can teach you the lessons you need for a lifetime. I do not think I am capturing the way sports makes Danny light up or how he turns into a 9 year old remembering all the facts or in awe of an athletic achievement…..so let’s just say he has inspired me to maybe understand the games a little better and appreciate why at least more than one TV can be helpful!
Danny’s love of sports may also be because most people in his shoes from previous decades did not participate. Danny played, excelled and still tries to keep them as a priority despite his largest struggle - Cystic Fibrosis (CF). Danny was diagnosed at birth with CF (you can read more here) and has been fighting ever since. It has been a huge part of his life, a large part of our story - but not everything and that is a balance we work very hard to achieve….part of the story we hope to share here. CF has showed Danny and I that everyone has thier own story, everyone has their own path, most things have a silver lining……and focusing on that is what can save you. More to come…..but I can’t conclude Danny’s intro without saying he has CF, it is hard - and Danny is nothing short of an inspiration. And just in case you were wondering….he would HATE that I say that - cause to him, its just his hand of cards.
When you think of struggles and dislikes CF is at the top of the list….but there are a few more such as a nagging wife (oops!), having to be “too planned”, wasting money, the Bravo channel…..but for the most part Danny actually keeps most things in perspective and has really taught me why that can be a gifted way of life. Just like anyone he has his ups and downs, but when he is really down I have heard him say it could always be worse. And when I am down and worried - he reminds me it could always be worse. And you know what…..it could be worse, we are lucky. In fact this part of life has really inspired us to have a little faith, to enjoy where we are and to never count on tomorrow and for that we are grateful.
Join us tomorrow to meet….SHIBA!
